Self awareness is the first step in emotional intelligence and it's certainly the first step when wanting to change things when you're not happy with your life. Without self awareness how would you know where to start? How would you know for example:
* The truth of the current situation
* What impact fear is having on the current outcome
* What beliefs you have that may be helping or hindering you
* How your language is impacting how you're feeling
* Whether you need to push a head or pull back
* What you get passionate about
* Whether what you get passionate about is aligned with those around you
* What you're motivated towards (pleasure) or away from (the pain)
* Whether you're better working with others on the changes you want to make, or
* If you're better doing it on your own, and
* Which of mind, body, heart and soul is the best place to start.
Understanding your answers to the questions above will certainly make life easier if you're wanting to make changes.
Alison Smith
Helping Purchasing Relationships become more self aware
This blog is part of a series of blogs on making changes when life is just getting you down. Here's the first in the series I wrote earlier in the month.
Tuesday, 8 March 2011
You have to put yourself first
People often complain about their lack of energy or concentration, not getting anything done, hating their jobs or about failing relationships at home or work. That is people tell us they're not happy with their life.
The challenge is we can all shout from the roof tops and tell them that they can do something about how they're feeling, that they can improve their relationships or can achieve more. But the crux is it requires doing something different and even more it requires them to make their life a priority.
If a friend or colleague was not happy with their life what would you do? I bet you'd spend your time trying to get them back on track, to make them smile, to encourage them to take time for themselves. Why is it so often different when we try to do the same for our own lives?
I was reminded about us having to put ourselves first today in a yoga class when someone was replying to texts between tracks. Her priority was the person needing the reply, and certainly not the tranquility she might have got from an hour of uninterupted yoga. She may have been right. How often, however, do we put others first when we know that it's really us that need the attention and tender loving care?
The tips this month require those wanting to make changes to be prepared to put themselves first - even if it's only for 5 mins a day.
The challenge is we can all shout from the roof tops and tell them that they can do something about how they're feeling, that they can improve their relationships or can achieve more. But the crux is it requires doing something different and even more it requires them to make their life a priority.
If a friend or colleague was not happy with their life what would you do? I bet you'd spend your time trying to get them back on track, to make them smile, to encourage them to take time for themselves. Why is it so often different when we try to do the same for our own lives?
I was reminded about us having to put ourselves first today in a yoga class when someone was replying to texts between tracks. Her priority was the person needing the reply, and certainly not the tranquility she might have got from an hour of uninterupted yoga. She may have been right. How often, however, do we put others first when we know that it's really us that need the attention and tender loving care?
The tips this month require those wanting to make changes to be prepared to put themselves first - even if it's only for 5 mins a day.
Thursday, 3 March 2011
Don't let it get so bad you smash up a cup cake shop!
Source: hummingbirdbakery.com via Alison on Pinterest
My blog this month is going to explore the following plea from me:
Please don't allow yourself any excuse for not exploring how to make improvements in your life. And I mean practical things you can do that could dramatically improve your energy, positivity and overall well being and joy for life. Thus allowing you to more easily achieve your goals and live your dreams rather than purely exist.
In other words if you're not happy with how you're feeling, acting or the things you're achieving or not achieving in life, then please do stop using those excuses and do something. You know the excuses don't you:
* I don't have time
* I can't
* It doesn't matter
* I can't be bothered
* I'm happy as I am
* It wont change anything
or even
* It's my age you know
The homeplay last weekend involved observing how you were feeling and then noticing the impact it had on other people and the impact it had on the outcome of what you were trying to achieve.
If your answer was 'I was enthused, energised and very happy and it was contagious' you may already know what I'm going to say. If you didn't then for me the crux is this - if you're feeling negative, tired, anxious, angry, or just down right grumpy it can't but have a negative impact on your life e.g:
* You don't go out to meet friends because you're too tired
* You fall out with a close friend over something silly
* You still don't take up that hobby you've been promising to do for years
* You put on the video for the kids rather than go outside and play with them
* You sit in front of the TV all weekend and eat rubbish
* Your blood pressure sky rockets
* You smash up a cup cake shop or worse (yes someone did just that)
We often act as if that's what life has thrown at us and just get on with it and put up with the anxiety, the grumps and negativity. My blog this month will explore all those small steps we can all take to make the necessary changes - and some of them are sooooooo easy, and even more effective, and WILL make a difference - or your money back.
Monday, 28 February 2011
Who's setting the unrealistic targets?
Whilst in personal training (PT) today I achieved a 27% reduction in time - I'm giving 15% to improved fitness and 12% to positivity and me setting a totally unrealistic target!!
In January I set out on a new regime to improve my fitness. Lots of reasons for setbacks in 2010 - no excuses in 2011! 6 weeks ago it took me just under 27 mins to do the circuit - a mix of weights, crunches and running. Today I managed it in just over 19 mins!! Somewhere in between would have been realistic but I had the idea I wanted the number under 20mins!
I'm sure the fact that I set the target had an impact. If my PT had set the target I'm sure I'd have resisted and never have achieved what I did.
Just wondering at work if we allow others to set the unrealistic and stretching targets for themselves if we'll all get more done?
Alison Smith
Helping purchasing relationships achieve stretching targets
In January I set out on a new regime to improve my fitness. Lots of reasons for setbacks in 2010 - no excuses in 2011! 6 weeks ago it took me just under 27 mins to do the circuit - a mix of weights, crunches and running. Today I managed it in just over 19 mins!! Somewhere in between would have been realistic but I had the idea I wanted the number under 20mins!
I'm sure the fact that I set the target had an impact. If my PT had set the target I'm sure I'd have resisted and never have achieved what I did.
Just wondering at work if we allow others to set the unrealistic and stretching targets for themselves if we'll all get more done?
Alison Smith
Helping purchasing relationships achieve stretching targets
Friday, 25 February 2011
Homeplay for the weekend
A year ago I was asked to blog on well being for HRZone and have been an active blogger since then. Over that time I've continued to share insights, observations and challenges from life. This has covered an array of subjects including motivation, effective communication, integrity and authenticity etc. In other words things that can transform our relationships and help us out of the creeks we find ourselves.
In March (and possibly even a smidgen in Feb) I'd like to go back to look at well being - for two reasons:
The 1st: I've just been on a Food4Life workshop and would love to share the learning
The 2nd: Our well being has a HUGE impact on the quality of our relationships
To provide you with the motivation to read my blog for the next few weeks I'd like to set you some homeplay (homework but of the fun variety) I'd like you to notice the impact how you're feeling has on others - whether you're:
Happy, Energised and motivated or
Angry, tired and apathetic or
somewhere in between.
The blog will then look at how to get more of what you want and less of the other.
In March (and possibly even a smidgen in Feb) I'd like to go back to look at well being - for two reasons:
The 1st: I've just been on a Food4Life workshop and would love to share the learning
The 2nd: Our well being has a HUGE impact on the quality of our relationships
To provide you with the motivation to read my blog for the next few weeks I'd like to set you some homeplay (homework but of the fun variety) I'd like you to notice the impact how you're feeling has on others - whether you're:
Happy, Energised and motivated or
Angry, tired and apathetic or
somewhere in between.
The blog will then look at how to get more of what you want and less of the other.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)